Gabrielle's blog

I am thrilled to announce that Karen Tyrell, author of Me and Her - A Memoir of Madness will be guesting on this blog on 17th May as part of Karen's International Blog Tour:

ME & HER Blog Tour 14th - 20th May

14th MayKaz Delaney- Writing Inspiration http://kazdelaney.wordpress.com/

>>> read more

I haven't written for a while because it has been VERY difficult for me to know what to write. If I had written anything it would have looked something like this:

>>> read more

I am feeling green around the gills... A 700mg dose of Carbamazepine (Tegretol) is doing its anti-suicidal work very well. The zone between my ears is wonderfully clear. If anything it is a little on the empty side but I can live with that.

Unfortunately it is working rather too well in two other areas:

>>> read more

Last Saturday (a week ago today) I hit rock bottom. I mean by that that I was fighting the urge to swallow all the pills in the house on a minute by minute basis. Who would have thought that staying alive could be THAT exhausting ... It's not so much that I desperately wanted to die but rather that I desperately wanted out of the torment I was in.

>>> read more

Things aren't improving much and I am finding it hard.

I can't do anything and because I can't do anything I don't know what to do with myself.

Bi-Polar Land is the only place I know where someone can sleep for eighteen hours straight and wake up just as exhausted as before going to bed. It drives people who go trough it crazy and I am no exception. It is driving me round the bend.

>>> read more

The last two days I have been in prison. I am not aware of having committed any crime but I have been incarcerated all the same.

I reach a point in the deep depression phase of my BPD (Bi-Polar Disorder) when my body feels like a block of concrete. I can hardly move. I walk about as if I were wearing an all-body straight jacket with heavy plaster casts on my legs. I feel like I weigh a ton. Each movement demands enormous effort. I am two inches away from becoming a statue.

>>> read more

Inmy book Conversations with Batty - How Talking to myself Kept Me Sane, I wrote a chapter on willpower and it's place in recovery.

Just so that you understand the 'conversation' that follows, here is how it came to be:

>>> read more

After a day of Amazing Grace, today was a day of Slipped Back down the Hole.  Fortunately the hole wasn't a Black Hole so, although my energy was low, I didn't feel like my very marrow was being sucked out by some hungry dog.  You have to be grateful for small mercies ....

>>> read more

It doesn't matter how many times I experience this process it amazes me, stuns me, baffles me, astonishes me and puzzles me. if I weren't limited by my vocabulary I could go on and on.

>>> read more
Syndicate content